Wednesday 3 April 2019

EGRESS

@pixabay


Phineas Taylor Barnum, an American showman, politician, author and businessman, was born on July 5, 1810.

Also called The Greatest Showman, he is remembered for many things.

In 1841, he purchased Scudder’s American Museum and renamed it to Barnum’s American Museum.

He upgraded the building by adding exhibits of stuffed animals.

He added live acts of dwarfs, jugglers, magicians and exotic women.

Models of cities and famous battles were displayed in the museum.

To attract the visitors he introduced hoaxes.

In 1842, he made live his first major hoax.

It was a creature with the head of a monkey and the tail of a fish, known as ‘Feejee’ mermaid.

Then he introduced a dwarf called ‘General Tom Thumb’ (the smallest person that ever walked alone).

But the person wasn’t a dwarf; he was a four years old boy who was trained to imitate grown-ups. General Tom Thumb imitated people from Hercules to Napoleon with ease.

Barnum justified his hoaxes. To him, the hoaxes were advertisements to draw attention towards the museum.

“I don’t believe in duping the public, but I believe in first attracting and then pleasing them.” 
- P.T. Barnum.

 And indeed, people were pleased.

His museum was a hit.

People from different corners of the world visited Barnum’s museum.

The visitors would spend their entire day drifting in the museum awing the exhibits.

This frustrated Barnum.

The profits were taking a hit because it became difficult to squeeze in more visitors.

To permit more visitors inside the museum, they have to make space.

But how?

Barnum devised a plan.

At every corner, he posted signs that read ‘This way to the Egress’.

The visitors thought that this is another startling attraction.

So they kept following the sign.

And before they knew, they were out of the museum.

If you google Egress, you will find that it means – ‘the action of going out of or leaving a place’

Or simply, Exit.

Many of the visitors were not aware of what Egress means.

To them, it was just another attraction.

And they couldn’t enter the museum again without paying the entry fees again.

Did Barnum cheat his visitors?

Or it was just a clever trick?

Tuesday 19 February 2019

The Pink Tie

In 1915, the great novelist P.G Wodehouse created a character called REGINALD JEEVES. 
Jeeves is an intelligent and infallible valet of Bertie Wooster.
We have already covered the brilliance of Jeeves in the past - Solve It Like Jeeves and There Is Always a Way. Now it's time for the third installment.

One fine day, Lady Malvern and her twenty-three-year-old son, Lord Pershore (nicknamed Motty), drops at Wooster’s place in NewYork.
Lady Malvern, a writer, is a close pal of Wooster’s rich aunt Agatha.
The purpose of Lady Malvern’s visit is simple.
For a month, she is touring prisons of America to collect the material for her new book. And while she is away, she wants Wooster to take her son in his company.
She assures Wooster that there won’t be any trouble from her son.
'My son is a home bird, a true vegetarian and teetotaler. Give him a nice book and he will be contented.' Lady Malvern says while looking at Motty, who is sitting with his mouth nuzzling the walking stick.
Wooster is not in favor to babysit Motty. But he agrees because of Aunt Agatha.
Lady Malvern thanks Wooster, and takes Motty with her to see a few of the sights before her train leaves. She promises Wooster that she will send Motty back early in the afternoon.
That night, upon returning from a social gathering, Wooster asks Jeeves, 'Lord Pershore gone to bed?'
‘No sir. His lordship has not yet returned.’
‘Not returned? What do you mean?’
‘His Lordship came in shortly after six-thirty, and, having dressed, went out again.’
Then, they hear a thud outside the front door. It was Lord Pershore who fell on the mat. He was in a state of inebriation and grunting in pain.
This was only a teaser.
Nights after nights, Lord Pershore got indulged in reveling parties, eating meat and drinking wine.
Wooster becomes worried. If anything happens bad to Lord Pershore the blame would come on him.
So he confronts Lord Pershore and demands an explanation behind his actions.
And Lord Pershore proudly gives an explanation – ‘The only excitement I get at Middlefold, is when one of the choir-boys is caught sucking chocolate during the sermon. Now I’m in New York for a month, I want to store a few happy memories for the long winter evening.’
Wooster is bewildered.
So he asks Jeeves for help. But Jeeves pays no attention to his sufferings.
And there was a reason behind Jeeves callousness.
Jeeves wasn’t in a favor of Wooster’s pink tie.
‘What’s wrong with the tie?’
‘Too ornate, sir.’
‘Nonsense! A cheerful pink. Nothing more.’
‘Unsuitable, sir.’
‘Jeeves, this is the tie I wear!’
‘Very good, sir.’
Meanwhile, the activities of Lord Pershore continued.
There were also some nights when Lord Pershore came with his bunch of young friends and made hullabaloo till the sun came out.
Finally, Wooster decides to take Lord Pershore with him every night. He thought that by keeping Lord Pershore in his company, he can stop him from getting involved in barmy activities.
But he was wrong.
One night, at a party and in the presence of Wooster, Lord Pershore started throwing soft-boiled eggs at an electric fan.
Unable to cope up with the silence of Jeeves and madness of Lord Pershore, Wooster decides to go away for a few weeks.
‘Jeeves, I’m going away – tomorrow morning by the first train. I shall go and stop with Mr. Todd in the country.’
‘Do you wish me to accompany you, sir?’
‘No.’
‘Very good, sir’.
But Wooster got bored in the country and came back within a week.
Upon his return, Wooster finds out from Jeeves that Lord Pershore is in prison.
‘Why?’
“He assaulted a constable, sir.’
‘Lord Pershore assaulted a constable!’
‘Yes, sir.’
Wooster becomes worried. What he will explain to Lady Malvern and Aunt Agatha?
But Jeeves assures him, that Lord Pershore will come out before Lady Malvern arrives.
And what if Lord Pershore is still sitting in the prison and Lady Malvern pops in.
‘I should inform her ladyship that his lordship has left for a short visit to Boston.’ 
Why Boston?’
‘Very interesting and respectable center, sir.’
‘Jeeves, I believe you’ve hit it.’
‘I fancy so, sir.’
Things went on comfortably and peacefully for a week. 
Then came the bomb.
Lady Malvern turns up while Lord Pershore is still in prison.
‘I hope Motty wasn’t in your way, Mr. Wooster?’ she asks.
‘Rather not! Great pals. Hit it off splendidly.’
‘You were his constant companion, then?’
And Wooster presented a pile of lies on how he and Lord Pershore had spent quality of time together.
We had a great time, I was awfully sorry when he went away to Boston.’
But Lady Malvern threw a dart and busted Wooster’s balloon of lies.
She tells Wooster, that she visited Blackwell’s Island prison yesterday to secure some material for her book, and saw Lord Pershore in a striped suit, sitting beside a pile of stones with a hammer in his hands.
‘So this is how you have looked after my poor, dear boy? So this is how you have abused my trust?
Before Wooster can utter any word, a soft voice spoke. It was Jeeves.
He explained to Lady Malvern, that Mr. Wooster was unaware of Lord Pershore’s movements as he was away, visiting a friend in the country. And it was him who told Mr. Wooster that Lord Pershore is in Boston.
Why?
‘It might have been hard for Mr. Wooster to believe that his lordship had gone to prison voluntarily.'
‘Voluntarily?’ Lady Malvern goggles at Jeeves.
And then Jeeves played his trump card.
He tells Lady Malvern that Lord Pershore wanted to help her out. As she was writing a book on American prison, Lord Pershore decided to make a personal examination into the prison system of the country- from within.
Lady Malvern’s anger melts away and she apologizes to Wooster before leaving.
On the breakfast table, a happy Wooster asks Jeeves if he needed anything.
Jeeves replies that he needed fifty dollars to clear the debt of honor.
‘I owe it to Lord Pershore.’ Jeeves says.
‘You owe Lord Pershore fifty dollars?’
And Jeeves narrated the incident that had put Lord Pershore behind the bars.
On the night when Lord Pershore got arrested, Jeeves met him on the street.
Being in an inebriated state, Lord Pershore mistook Jeeves for a friend of his. Sensing an opportunity, Jeeves took the liberty of wagering him fifty dollars that he would not punch a passing policeman in the eye.
Lord Pershore accepted the bet and won it.
Wooster takes out his pocket-book and counts out a hundred.
‘Take this, Jeeves, fifty isn’t enough.'
So Jeeves had used his power of creativity and freed his master from the clutches of Lord Pershore. He also saved him from the fire of Lady Malvern and Aunt Agatha.
But what happened to that pink tie?
Well, Wooster requested Jeeves to burn it down.
And Jeeves did it happily.

Monday 11 February 2019

The Sticky Hunting Trip

Year: 1941


The dog uttered a squeal. 
George de Mestral, a Swiss electrical engineer in his mid-thirties gave the dog an unfriendly stare.
“What’s up buddy, haven't you enjoy our hunting trip?” George asked while unbuttoning his gray overcoat.
The dog made another squeak and shook his entire body. 
“You didn’t like the alps, old boy?” George raised his arm to throw the overcoat on the chair. But he stopped abruptly.
“What the hell is this?” George murmured. He was staring at his overcoat. Little brown burdock seeds where clinging everywhere on his overcoat.
He sat next to his dog.
“Oh my goodness!” He gasped, caressing the hairy body of the dog. “They are on you as well. So that’s why you were so anxious old boy”.
George gave the dog a bath. But he couldn’t forget those tiny brown burdock seeds.

He collected a few seeds from the overcoat. “Old boy, ready for some excitement?” George said to his dog.
After a few minutes, the Swiss electrical engineer was examining the brown burdock seeds under a microscope.
“Hmmmm…..interesting….w…wait”.
George had a light bulb moment.

A couple of days later, inside the office of a textile industry.
“No.” The executive nodded his head left to right. “George, you are an electrical engineer, stick to your occupation. You are just wasting your time here”.
 “You are not getting the point, Mr. Executive,” George said softly. “I had examined these burdock seeds under the microscope. These seeds have hundreds of tiny hooks that can stick to almost anything.  They can stick to clothing, hair, fur, on my dog. If…”
 “You are wasting my time”. The executive interrupted.
But George's excitement was on another level. He continued his pitching.
“If these seeds can cling to almost anything, then I’m sure that we can find a material that can be stick together in a similar way.”
“And?” The executive yawned.
“We just need to figure how we can make the hooks and loops on the material. We just need to imitate the property of the seeds. And…”
“Sorry George, I have a meeting to attend, kindly leave”. The Executive said, pointing towards the door.
A disappointed George walked away.
George took his idea to many industrialists. But none of them became interested. For the next few days, his ears became familiar to -
“That’s sound nice, but we don’t have time to do this Mr. George”.
“Are you kidding George”.
“It ain’t work”.
“Sorry George”.
After many rejections, a weaver in Lyon took some interest in George’s experiment.
“Isn’t this fantastic?” The weaver said in excitement. He was holding two strips of cotton cloth. On one strip were tiny hooks and on the other were loops.
 “Let’s do this”. George's eyes gleamed with happiness.
The weaver then placed the hooks of one strip on the loops of the other strip.
“It is working”. George said.
The weaver nodded in agreement.
Kkkkkrrrriiiissshhh, a sound clung in the small room as the weaver pulled the two strips apart.
“It is working”. George said in happiness.
But George’s happiness was short-lived. The cotton cloth wore out quickly. But he didn’t give up. After a series of experiments, he settled on nylon.
“Old boy...” George glanced at the dog and then lifted a piece of nylon from the table. “When nylon is sewn under hot infrared light, it forms hooks.”
  “Just like this old boy”. He picked another piece of nylon, but this was different. It had several tiny hooks on one surface.
“But something is still not in line”. George said while scratching his hand.
And he was right.
George had figured out how to make the hooks, but he had to still make the loops. After several days of hard work, he made the loops. When the nylon was woven in loops and subjected to heat, it was retaining its shape. But-
“This is not good old boy. The loops…how can the loops mate perfectly with the hooks?” George groaned. But the dog wasn’t paying any attention.
“I will give up. I’m tired”. George threw the piece of nylon on the table. His eyes smothered with sorrow. “I give up”.
Then an idea popped up in George’s mind that changed his life.
He took a pair of shears and trimmed the tops of the loops.
“Look, old boy, just look”. George said happily to his dog. “The hooks are mating perfectly with the loops”. The dog waived his tail. 
George has just invented Velcro.
It took another ten years for George to create a perfect Velcro. In 1951, he submitted the idea for patent in Switzerland. The patent was granted in 1955.
Velcro became famous in the early 1960s when it was used by astronauts to move in and out of their heavy suits. Soon the scuba, marines and skiers, realized the significance of the unusual... Kkkkkrrrriiiissshhh...sounding sticky material.
Let's give our thanks to George De Mestral and his dog for taking up that hunting trip in the Alps.

Note: The incident is real, but the scenarios and dialogues are fictional (for entertainment purpose).

EGRESS

@pixabay Phineas Taylor Barnum, an American showman, politician, author and businessman, was born on July 5, 1810. Also called ...